My friend Chuck over at Big God Adventures has articulated what is in my heart. I need a challenge something to fight for. I think a big reason for the funk I’ve been battling is because I need something to fight for.
Yearning for the Wild
I’ve been thinking about how tame i am. i work in a cool office. live in a great, comfortable house. have heat and ac in house, car and work.
But something in me wants a fight. i want to run with scissors or climb up on the roof or drive in a blinding snowstorm or play tackle football in a mudpit. i need something untamed.
I’ve read Wild at Heart and know that as a man, i need a battle. I’m reading a book on the wild Jesus from the book of Mark. but there’s something deeper than just reading books.
there is a true craving to roar like a man. Any woman reading this probably won’t understand, hopefully the men will. there is something primal that needs to come out. Playing music helps to release that. As a bass player/singer, there is definitely something wild about that rumble of the bass and a good yell or scream.
I think i need some man-time. some camping and hiking, growing a neck beard, finding and cooking your food over a flame. anyone have an empty cabin i could hide away for a few days in? anyone up for some gut-level living? strength, passion, honesty – that’s what i’m looking for.